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© 2018 Michele Matthews

A Real Woman (Reboot, 2016)

November 22, 2019

 

I first wrote this article in 2016, I recently came across it again and felt it bared repeating: 

 

One small compliment goes a long way. Have you ever noticed that when someone pays you a sincere compliment how it just changes your whole outlook?  Or the look on someone’s face when you are the one giving the compliment?  Compliments are easy.  They don’t cost a thing and they make the giver and the receiver feel so good.  That is, if you are able to receive (and give) compliments.

 

I used to be a person who couldn’t receive compliments.  I’m sure there is some deep, dark psychological reason why but I don’t care to investigate the why behind it.  I just know that part of me didn’t really believe that I was worthy of the compliment.  Finally, someone said to me, “just say thank you”.  So I did.

 

Now I find myself giving and receiving compliments all the time and doing so keeps a smile on my face.

 

Recently, I was having a conversation with a new client at the wellness center.  I had just finished her assessment and we were chatting about scheduling her personal training sessions.   As we spoke to each other I noticed she was looking at me in a strange way – like there was something that she wanted to say but wasn’t sure how to.  At the end of the conversation she asked me how old I was.

 

“I’m 51”

She smiled this huge smile and said that she would have guessed maybe early 40s.  She explained that it was just so hard to tell because I had an heir of maturity but still looked quite young.  She herself was 60 (and didn’t look it) and told me that I should be very proud of myself and that she was glad that her trainer was a real woman.

 

A real woman. 

 

I like that.  I can’t say that I am 100% sure what she meant but I love the idea of being thought of as “real”.  I’m grateful that she saw something in me that translated as real.

 

I love being able to interact with people in this way.  It’s interesting to me because I am 100% introvert but when I have the opportunity to work with someone and help them to improve their fitness level and they actually receive it – there is nothing better.

 

I love the fact that there is no “one-size-fits-all” in fitness.  Different things work for different people and there are no absolutes.  Yes, there are general concepts that work for most people (e.g., weight loss = calories out > calories in) but if a person has specific goals general concepts aren’t always the answer. 

 

That’s where I come in.  I enjoy talking to people to really get to the nitty-gritty of what they really want.  I don’t want to rush it which is why I cannot and will not provide a quick fix.  I don’t do quick because quick doesn’t last.  I work on behaviors which lead to permanent changes.  I know that philosophy is not popular or sexy and that’s okay because it’s honest and I sleep like a baby at night knowing that I never gave bad advice to someone just so I could make a dollar.

 

Maybe that’s what makes me a real woman.

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